Validation

I wonder. Is being busy good or bad? I've noticed that my thoughts are returning to thinking about church again, and I think its because I am on vacation. I thought I wasn't thinking about it very much because I am SO over it. Apparently not. I think I was just too busy doing other things to think about it. Also, apparently I have also been too busy to fight with my husband. Because we did a little of that on our Christmas break. Good times. :) We made up, though. Also good times. I have also been so busy with other things that I haven't made very many cards. I DID make all my Christmas cards this year, but in stages. The other day I made a beautiful card, and it was wonderful. Its such a great re-creational thing for me to do. Now that I am semi-used to working full-time, I am feeling the need to get more organized. (I usually do this before a new year starts, by the way). I am usually SO tired by the time I get home from work, all I can do is veg out until the glorious ti...

Years ago in San Diego, I experienced church community in a very deep and meaningful way. Our group of friends was so special to us. We just enjoyed being around them - included and important. Hanging out with them was fulfilling on a deep level for me. Sharing the holidays with them and their families filled a void in my soul. Giving and receiving. Celebrating and grieving. Playing and praying. It was one of the best times in my life. Then, we moved. I started looking for my new family. Didn't find it right away. Then, we started going to a church where I thought I could find it again. Spent almost five years waiting for it to happen, but it didn't. I "checked all the boxes": joined small groups, served, etc. Served, served, served, served. Oh yeah - did I say serve? This is also the place where I got burned as well as experienced a major burn out. Duh. It's been about four years since that happened. I feel like I have healed from that experience, but I am at a p...

Ben started his third year in AWANA last night. This year he is a T 'n' T kid! I'm so proud of him and how he loves the Lord. He is so good at memorizing his verses - its amazing! He loves game time, too. I'm so happy he is part of AWANA! His outfit consisted of my cowboy boots, Joe's belt and buckle and Melanie's bandanna. I think he looked pretty sharp! Ben is never afraid to dress up for the theme nights at AWANA. Yesterday, he paraded around in the front yard for his friends. When they asked him why he was dressed like a cowboy, he said "its for AWANA!"

I went back to work at my clinical site today. (My daughter says I can't call it "work" since I don't get paid, but let me tell ya, I DO work!) It has been a few weeks since I have been there, and I was a little nervous about going back, knowing I would be a little "rusty." All in all, it was a good day. I got to spend most of the day over at the "inpatient" ultrasound department of the hospital. The outpatient side is more like a clinic, where the inpatient side is more like what you imagine a hospital to be - with sick people and ER patients. Anyway, I had the opportunity to assist with some invasive procedures, such as thoracentesis (draining of the lung spaces). I had some sweet, older patients today and I just enjoy them. Its sad to see them so frail and not feeling well. They love it when I get them the heated blankets and get them all warm and cozy. :) Today, I was thinking that I could just get people warm blankies all day and ...

Why is it, when you state an opinion, do others find it necessary to take it upon themselves to "correct" you? Why do we get offended by the opinions of others if it is an opinion we don't share? Why do we need to comment on the opinions of others at all? Can't we just say: "hmmmm...." or "that's an interesting point of view...." or "I don't share that opinion, but it is something to think about...." Just wondering..... I found some quotes on opinions that I particularly liked.... Your opinion is your opinion, your perception is your perception--do not confuse them with "facts" or "truth". Wars have been fought and millions have been killed because of the inability of men to understand the idea that EVERYBODY has a different viewpoint. -JOHN MOORE, Quotations for Martial Artists It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude after our own; but the great man is he w...

I was driving in the car the other day, and I sort of realized that I am a working mom now. I mean, I know I've been going to school and beginning my full-time clinical rotations, but as I am approaching the end of my summer break, I realize that this is my last long vacation at home like this. I start my next rotation soon, which ends in June. After that, I will become employed. After being at home for 15 years before I started this new college adventure, this is kind of a big realization for me. I'm going to be one of those moms now. Even though I have always been a proponent for staying at home, I've never really been critical of moms who work outside the home. I think staying at home is awesome, but I don't think its what every woman should do. Some say the Bible states that women "should" do this, and have taken a couple of verses and turned them into huge homemaking theologies (I would go so far as saying "religions"). Some even say that a wo...

I usually have a pile of books next to my bed or in my nightstand. Lately, it has been ultrasound or anatomy books. But, since I'm off from school for a few weeks, I got a couple of new books that are not ultrasound related. 1. Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, by Peter Scazerro 2. Crazy Love, by Francis Chan I started both books at the same time, and then decided I should stick to just one. Its hard for me, because I just want to race through them and devour them. But, I know that when I read too fast, I don't absorb what I should. So, I'm trying to get the most out of them by taking it slow. Anyway, both of these books are Christian books about relationship with God. I felt drawn to these books because I am feeling the need to start afresh in a way with the Lord. Since my burnout experience almost three years ago, I have not served in the church on a regular basis. I volunteered twice in a small capacity, but that's it. I have needed healing, for one thing. I have als...

I would really like to.... go kayaking.... get a haircut... move... be done with school... go back in time and hold each of my kids when they were babies... make some cards... see Jesus... lose 10 pounds... get two kittens... spend more time developing a good friendship... be in menopause... get into a really good book... feel confident at my clinical site... What would you really like to do?

I passed my first ultrasound credentialing milestone: I passed the Physics Registry exam! YAHOO!!

Wow. I'm half-way through my first quarter of full-time clinicals. My site instructor came and observed me scanning, and I passed my evaluation. YES! I also had my first "seminar," which is a day set aside for all the classmates to come together, share stories from our sites and present cases. I presented a pelvic case on Adenomyosis, and got 50 out of 50! Can I get another "YES!" I have learned so much and come so far in these four weeks. So many things that I have learned in class make so much more sense to me now. My skills have have grown each day, and now I can pretty much perform a full pelvic exam, both transabdominally and transvaginally. Yes, I do that. I can also pretty much perform a full renal exam as well (we look at aorta, kidneys, bladder...). I am getting there with my full abdomen exams. I'm still slow, which is to be expected, but I am learning how to sweep through organs, and train my eye to notice the abnormal, subtle things. ...

So, I was thinking about how much effort went into parenting Amanda during her senior year, and I thought I would share some of the things I learned. There were many things I didn't expect, and wished someone had told me, so hopefully this will be helpful to someone else! I learned.... 1. A lot of money goes out for senior year stuff. All I can say is: save money for the senior year. For example: announcements, postage, cap/gown stuff, tickets to graduation ceremony, senior pictures, gifts for other seniors, college application fees, prom, accumulating items for the future dorm like bedding and laptop, etc., etc..... 2. Start preparing in the junior year. Its good for the student to study for SAT test, student as well as mom/dad should research colleges and narrow down choices, buy books and learn about college application processes, research scholarships (buy books and/or go online for that), learn about the FAFSA (federal application for financial student aid), talk to lo...

Yesterday we held an open house in honor of Amanda's graduation. It was so much fun having people float in and out of the house. I wished I was ten people, so I could have spent more time with each person. Amanda enjoyed seeing lots of friends and even teachers who stopped by....It was an awesome day... My sister Stephanie's husband, Ryan, Diego the dog, me, Samantha and Stephanie Samantha, little Anna (Stephanie's daughter), Stephanie and me Anna, Stephanie and Samantha Mark (friend from our high school past), Rhonda Marsh (Amanda's violin instructor) Dean (Joe's buddy) and his son, Caiden Jenn, Adam and Amanda (long-time friends and old neighbors) The "crew" Amanda and her private violin teacher, Rhonda Paige and Amanda. They became friends in second grade when we lived in Federal Way for a year. They have kept in touch ever since... Amanda's buddies The spread. A couple of my ultrasound classmates stopped by. These are my prayer buddies, Olga ...

I'm wondering about church growth engines. Having been burned out in the past by buying into the "cause" of church growth, I am skeptical and suspicious of things (i.e., events) that are designed to bring more people into a church. I really wonder about the reasons for doing such a thing - is the core, true, heartfelt desire to reach as many people as possible with the gospel? Or, is the real agenda to "build" an entity, an organization into a mega-one - sort of like building a business? And why would the desire BE to be a mega entity? More pay for staff? Get bigger and better buildings with more fancy stuff? Feed egos? Be "known?" I know its very cynical of me, but I can't help it. I've seen it, experienced it and burned out because of buying into a growth agenda. I've been wondering if it is possible to be part of a church and follow only the agenda God has for ME, and not that of others. I've been feeling something all too...

My week off is coming to an end. I am feeling really relieved and proud to have finished one year of the ultrasound program! I received a 93% or above for each of my classes, and I give all the glory to God for providing me with this success. I am also feeling a little anxious and excited to start full-time clinicals on Monday. I wonder how our family is going to adjust and how I'm going to do with more expectations placed on me by the sonographers. I've been reviewing a lot of information during my break, so I will be ready. I will take my physics registry exam next month, which will give me half the title of a sonographer. :) After my year in clinicals, I will take my Abdomen and OB/Gyn exams which will allow me to put an "RDMS" (Registered Diagnostic Medical Sonographer) after my name. Woo Hoo! Joe got "bumped" out of his position at work, which means crappy hours and less pay. We're trusting the Lord that He has some sort of great plan for t...

I am still here. Here's what I've been doing: Going to school Monday through Friday Going to school on Saturdays to practice scanning and complete projects Going to Ben's baseball games Attending end-of-year school concerts and youth symphony concert Mailing graduation announcements Buying flowers to pretty up the yard for upcoming graduation open house Applying for scholarships for myself for next year Going to the hospital once a week for my clinical time Studying Studying Studying Making sure Amanda's college paperwork is done and mailed off Thinking about when I could possibly get my hair done Thinking about how I am going to pull off said graduation open house Going to AWANA derby car race Going to AWANA awards night - Ben got Sparky of the year! Checking my Facebook before I go to bed Studying before I fall asleep Studying in my sleep Thinking about what it will be like to have my didactics done and start clinicals full time in about THREE WEEKS!!! Yeah. That...

I wrote this a few weeks ago, but am just getting around to posting it. This quarter has been another intense one in the ultrasound program. That said, I am more and more loving what I am doing. Plus, by the grace of God, I keep doing well. I just got back mid-term scores and I am sitting pretty. It is only because of Him that I am where I am today. I am just amazed at how He is empowering me to accomplish this stuff. He is so amazing. OH! AND! I initiated a little prayer group with some girls (they're 21, 25, and 23, I think) from my class, and WHAT a blessing it is to be around them. They are truly a gift from God. They are incredible examples of young people following Christ with their whole hearts. I am in awe of them. Their walk with God has blessed me beyond words. You would think as the "older" woman in the group, that I would have something to add to their lives - well it is really just the opposite. God has been SO good to me..... I LOVE, LOVE, LOV...

I'm going to be a CWU Mom! Yahoo!!

Happy Easter!! He is Risen!! Mark 16:1-8 When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus' body. Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb and they asked each other, "Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?" But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed. "Don't be alarmed," he said. "You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, 'He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.' " Trembling and bewildered, the women went out and fled from the tomb. They said nothing to any...

Amanda and I went down to Pt. Defiance Park and Owen Beach for her senior photo shoot today! I must say, it was gorgeous and sunny, which made for magical pictures being taken. Our photographer, Crystal was awesome, and I can't wait to receive our disc in the mail of all the pics she took!! Don't worry. I will post some! I also started planning for Amanda's graduation open house celebration! We nailed down the date, and sent our preliminary emails to most friends and family.... I can't believe I have a senior!!

I had my first day at my clinical site today. It was awesome. There were some sad moments with patients, some happy ones and some interesting ones. It was a great day, overall. I really felt like I knew what I was seeing as I observed and THAT was a VERY satisfying feeling. I got a little emotional as I drove to the site this morning, thinking about how hard I've been studying and pushing myself - and now to be going to my first site. Whew. Its such a cool experience. This one day a week experience is coming at just the right time for me, as it will probably be the inspiration I need to keep pushing myself. Its a little taste of the real thing, I guess. A reminder of the goal - the end prize for all this intensity.... Today I wanted to grab up one patient and hug them, but as an observing student, it isn't my place to provide patient care. I did go into the restroom and shed a little tear and said a little prayer for them. I hope that I don't become too desensit...

Ten Things I Just Don't Understand 1. The sport of curling 2. Hairless dogs 3. Mean people 4. People who can't decide when to go at 4-way stops 5. Black coffee 6. Spending $500 on a purse 7. Why its necessary to yell at your children at Walmart 8. Sporting 80's hairdo in 2009 9. Smoking 10. Not wearing deodorant What are YOUR 10??

I am nearing the end of my Spring Break, and definitely feeling like I have had enough restorative downtime. I'm SO glad I feel this way, because I've been pushing SO hard and I don't know if I could go into another quarter without being completely rested up. Spring quarter's going to be a doozy. Five classes, and one day a week of clinicals. This quarter we have OB and vascular courses, which I am guessing are going to be quite challenging. I'm up for it. Every new type of scan I learn, I claim as my "favorite." So, we'll see if OB and vascular become my favorites too. My husband and my kids have been very understanding and supportive of this season in my life. Joe is still cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids. The girls are busy girls, and tend to want to be with friends a lot, so I don't think they miss me much. Benny and I get in our "lovin" when he's feeling needy. Even when I'm studying, the kids know whe...

C + P = E Circumstances + Perspective = Your Experience "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. " (Romans 8:28)

My problem is not life-threatening like the situation in my previous post, but rather, dream threatening. My daughter wants to go to a Christian, private college that she has fallen in love with. I want her to go there. I know her, and I know that this kind of environment is where she would thrive as a person. It has the programs she needs to become a music teacher. But, she didn't get enough financial aid award money. Sure, she could become indebt up to her ears and take the next 20 years to repay it on a teacher's salary. But, that's not wise. I suppose some people do it, but what kind of life would that be for her, being enslaved to this huge debt? We have been a one-income family all this time, half of which was spent in the military. Needless to say, we haven't been able to save anything for college. What we have done is try to invest in her developing her music talents with the hope that it would help her get to college with scholarships, etc. She got a li...

I have a heavy heart today for a mom I know only through blogging. I began praying for this mom when she was pregnant with her sweet baby boy, doctors thought would surely die in utero, or shortly after birth. Well, God performed a miracle and he is four months old now. A few days ago, he got a virus and his heart started acting up. Now, he is in the ICU and his situation is serious. Would you please pray for Stellan and his mommy? You can read their story if you click on my sidebar link "My Charming Kids." This is a beautiful family who loves God, and has incredible faith....

Well, I'm alive. I'm completely spent, but still breathing. I completed all of my exams last week, and topped it off with volunteering at our church's youth conference ("Sold Out") on Saturday morning, followed by a family birthday party. The good news is, is that I received A's for all of my final exams, and my final grades for all of my classes are above 92%. I am so proud of myself. I am also SO very tired, and SO wanting Spring Break. However, I have to spend the first two days of it doing Physics Review to prepare for our Physics registry exam. We elected to do this as a class, and I guess it will pay off, but I am SO not wanting to go back there right now..... I bought some comfy new active wear so at least I can feel cute and cozy while doing Physics tomorrow...a new outfit always helps things, right? :)

I have five final exams next week. FIVE. One on each day of the week.

I received my clinical site yesterday!! I am so excited. My whole class has been eagerly awaiting this announcement since the beginning of our program. I received a hospital setting for my first clinical assignment, and it is not too far away!! YAY!! I had been praying that I wouldn't be sent to some far away place, making it a hardship on my family. I am just thrilled to be sent to this hospital, because I think I will get to see a wide variety of patients and issues. It will be a great experience for me. I am also very nervous. I know that I lack scanning experience, but I still have this hope that I will walk in there and be good at what I do. It is just so very important to me to be good at what I do. I guess I know I must realize that it takes many, many hours of experience to accomplish this. I also know they don't expect me to be at their level of expertise, but I do know that there is some expectation that I should know a lot. Anyway, I start at my clinical s...

My son enjoys writing. A LOT. He writes long, elaborate "books." He likes to have them look like a real book, so I cut up plain paper and he staples covers to it. He LOVES writing. He is extremely descriptive and creative. He will spend weeks completing a book. I asked his teacher to give him extra opportunities to develop his passion in class. She, of course, wanted to make sure that what he writes about what is appropriate for school. Blah, blah, blah. Ben likes to write about blood and guts sometimes, and of course, school is not for "violence." Blah,blah, blah.... Anyway, Ben has been writing a comic book at school this past week under his teacher's guidance. I received a note home from the teacher that went like this: "FYI-Ben worked very hard on a comic this week. :) At one point it had a coach giving a runner "crazy water" that tasted funny and made the boy "feel weird." I talked to Ben about being sure he wrote about...

I saw the doc today regarding my thyroid nodule. He is basically not concerned at this point. He wants to see me in three months to scan it again in his office to check on it. If anything has changed, I guess he'll do a biopsy. He didn't get the feeling that it needed to be biopsied right now. Okey dokey.

Ben had his 8th birthday party at the bowling alley last month, and I am just now getting around to posting a couple pics. Also, last night, Melanie was invited to a winter formal dance by Jacob, who attends another high school. They both attend the same church and youth group. So, here's the pics: There were 8 boys bowling, including Ben. What a fun party! Ben opening his presents. It was so cute watching Ben read his cards with all the boys listening intently. :) Melanie and Jacob at his parents' house. They made their group dinner before the dance. Melanie and Jacob. So color coordinated, huh? Jacob's mom said they hunted all over town for that gold tie. :)

It's late and I'm still up. I just thought I would give an update on my thyroid nodule. There is no update. I will meet with my endocrinologist next week on Wednesday. We're going to go over the images together and decide what to do. I think its going to be cool to talk with the doc about my images, because I will actually know what I am looking at and what he is talking about. I love being smart. +++++++++++++++++++++++++ Do you remember that scene in the Breakfast Club where the principal said something about "cracking some skulls?" Yeah. I use that phrase when I am mad at someone, or if my kids are in trouble. So today I am mad at someone and I would REALLY LIKE TO CRACK SOME SKULLS!!!!! I know this is all totally random, but it makes me feel better to say it. Plus, I'm really tired and loopy. Good night.

Are you ever doing something and you start thinking about writing about it later on your blog? Today, I was at an ultrasound conference and was thinking about just that. I was sitting there enjoying some herbal tea and fascinated by watching a presentation on hernias. I don't think I ever would have thought that hernias would be so interesting, but today they were. We watched a video of a real-time sonogram showing how to detect hernias. I got some really good information! We also heard presentations on pelvis abnormalities (adenomyosis, ectopic pregnanies, etc.), medical legal issues, preventing spread of infection, pre-natal echocardiography and pre-natal testing for birth defects and developmental abnormalities. It was very cool for me, as a student, entering into this sonography world for a day. I realized that the terminology we are being taught is really spoken in real life - AND I actually understood it! I also got the chance to see some of the gals who allowed me to ...

OK, so now I'm scared again to be a sonographer. The other day, we learned about Thoracentesis. The procedure itself isn't what scares me - it's a draining of fluid from the chest (with a needle and tube). What scares me is that MY job is to scan the patient's back, and mark their back with an "X." This "X" is what the radiologist uses to stick the needle into. If you get the spot wrong, the doc could stick the needle into the lung on accident, and the patient has a pneumothorax (collapsed lung). Greeeeaaaaaat......Last night, I looked up Thoracentesis on YouTube, just to feel better about this. There was an entire educational video on the whole procedure! I guess you can find anything on YouTube! But, I'm still scared.

Spokane was great. Our flight was only 50 minutes, and when we arrived there was snow piled up everywhere - they must have gotten a LOT of snow! We got a rental car and drove to our hotel, which left a lot to be desired. Plus, they didn't give us the right room, so we shared a bed. Oh well - Amanda doesn't snore. :) We went out to dinner, and poked around Target before heading back to the hotel to study a little bit. The next afternoon was Amanda's audition. We killed some time getting coffee and shopping before heading over to the college. I did not go into Amanda's audition with her, but she was very pleased and proud of herself when she finished!! Yay Amanda!! We drove around the Whitworth campus and she showed me where everything was (she and Joe toured the campus back on October). It's a nice, small campus with wonderful students. Amanda wants to go there so badly.... I am praying for Amanda to receive a hefty, if not a full ride scholarship there. ...

Amanda and I are flying over to Spokane tomorrow afternoon so she can perform in a college music scholarship audition. Pray for our safe travels and success for Amanda! :)

We started scanning breasts in our lab today. I know this is crass, but decided that I really like scanning boobs. I had one of mine scanned. I have a lot of fat in it, but this is because of my age. I scanned all ages and sizes today. The smaller ones are not as fun as the bigger ones. But, you can see the chest wall muscles really well with small ones. That was cool. I asked my lab teacher what she would think about scanning breasts all day. She said something about wanting to kill herself or something like that. I don't know if I could ONLY scan breasts all day long everyday - I might get sick of it, I guess, but I really liked it today....... Our lab teacher made fake testicles and a penis out of water balloons today. She tied them to one of my classmates with a nylon. This was done to show us how to position the male genitalia for a scrotal exam. I'm sure that the first real scrotal exam I perform will be awkward for me, but I intend to think about doing the b...

I did pretty darn good on my midterms - yes, pretty darn good. A couple of A's, a B and one not-so-good-grade that they're giving us a chance to make up because most of the class did badly, too. I'm not worried. I'll do the make-up work, get back in good standing and keep working my little hiney off. Good stuff, I tell ya. Good stuff.

I SCANNED A BABY! A pregnant lady came into my class on Friday and I got to scan her belly. I found myself smiling the whole time. It was SO much fun. I also heard some pretty awesome ultrasound stories from my teacher. She told of a day when a brain surgeon called her in to scan a BRAIN in the middle of a surgery to remove a brain tumor. She walked in and the skullcap was removed and there was this naked BRAIN. She had to scan it to see if they removed all of the tumor. Is that not AWESOME or what?! I wish I had been there.... She also told a story about how she had to scan a spinal cord of a patient who was lying on their stomach and their spine was completely exposed. "Fileted like a fish" was more like how she explained it. I wish I had been there too..... After a couple of difficult weeks in my program, I got the inspiration I needed that day to renew my vision for becoming a sonographer. Ever since I started my pre-req's, I have tried to keep this vision of myself i...

Right now, I would like to be out on a quiet, serene lake on a sunny day paddling a kayak and fishing. Where would you like to be right now?

I was hugging and loving on my son this morning, and he said "How do you get such a good smell? Is it your makeup?" I said, "Maybe. How did you get so handsome? You must have got it from me." He says, "Yeah. You're so handsome. How did you get so juicy?"

So, last Wednesday I went into my endocrinologist's office to discuss my recent ultrasound. I opted to meet with his partner, so I could get my results quicker. The best laid plans of mice and men...... He only had the radiologist's report and not the images. When I asked my teacher about this, she said it was typical for doctors to do business this way. I think it's stupid. Anyway, after reading the report, this endocrinologist now wants to see the images. He said he would order them and see me in a month. A MONTH?! The whole reason I went to the imaging center to have my thyroid scanned in the first place was so I didn't have to wait until March to have my endocrinologist do it in his office! THEN, I made an appointment with his partner so I wouldn't have to wait to hear the results! NOW, I'm still having to wait until March! My teacher says it only takes a day or two to get images, so I'm going to call the office back and be a squeaky wheel again...

I would like to put a big "X" over my previous post. Here's how I am going to re-write it. I had a difficult week. For the most part, I did the best I could. I messed up at times, but it doesn't define me. My son was very sick. On one of his worst nights wheezing in the bathroom breathing shower steam, he asked me to pray for him. He cried out to God, "heal me!" I am amazed that he has somehow grasped from me the fact that God heals, and the first thing we should do is pray and ask for help. Good Mom. I screwed up and did something spiteful that turned out worse than I intended. It was sin, but my soft heart was convicted immediately and I asked for forgiveness. I apologized to the person. I get to start over. Imperfect Redeemed Christian. I thought I botched a test. Almost everyone else did, too. Come to find out, there were some points on my test that were not counted, and our teacher is also going to give us an opportunity to redeem ourselves. When I su...

I was going to recap my rotten week for you and title it "Basically, I Suck." I have seriously had a horrible week, starting off with a very sick boy and not being able to stay home with him. Horrible mother. This week I also made a decision out of spite, that turned out worse than I intended - it was basically sin that came out of a sinful attitude. I have been convicted to the core and ashamed. Horrible Christian. THIS followed by a botched test. Horrible student. THIS followed by my very first speeding ticket. Ever. I've never even been pulled over. When I saw the flashing lights, it was like I wasn't even surprised. I had been feeling so crappy that I almost half-expected that something worse would happen. And, thanks to the speed trap on River Road and my distracted brain, it did. Today, I was feeling like such a sucky person, I cried the entire half hour to school, praying for the one hundredth time for forgiveness for my failures. I took my Physics midterm, and...

I have 5 midterms coming. 3 this week and two next week. Please pray for me! I would greatly appreciate it. :)

I got my copy of "Mad Church Disease" today!!! It looks SO good!!! Anybody who goes to church should read it!!

Today, I called my endocrinologist's office to find out if he had seen my thyroid images. Apparently, he has, but has not written any notes yet. The nurse said I would probably have to wait until my scheduled appointment with him in.....March. I sighed and said that is an awfully long time to wait. She asked me if I wanted to schedule with his partner. I actually did an observation in this office, and observed this man doing thyroid biopsies. He is a very neat, older man so I said "yes." I have an appointment with him next week!

I walked downstairs tonight and Ben was arranging pillows and other items on the floor. He said he was building an obstacle course. He was also wearing only his Spider-Man underwear. I asked him, "How come you're only wearing undies?" His response: "That's how I roll, Mom. That's how I roll."

I had my thyroid ultrasound today. My very special friend wanted to come with me and my husband too. I'm sure it was a very boring sonogram to watch for them though! I should find out what the doc says about the sonogram in a few days. Or, rather, they will be getting a phone call from ME wanting to know what the doc says about my sonogram! Squeaky wheel gets the grease, I always say! After my sonogram, I went out to coffee with my friend. It was SO nice to step off the studying treadmill and spend time with her. We had such a great talk, and we held hands and prayed together before we left. I love that! I love my friend. It just feels good to know and be known by others. To share life together - good and bad, give and receive, support and celebrate.....It's been awhile since I've had girlfriend time, and I realize that I really need to cultivate that in my life more....... Thank you Lord, for the dear friends You have brought into my life.

Last night at church, I saw a couple from our "old church." They have been trying it out, I guess. I talked with them for awhile, and told them the story of how we ended up attending the church we attend now. I was uncanningly aware of how I felt as I told the story. I was laughing. I was genuinely laughing. I think that's an indication of healing. Two years ago when I told the story, I was disgusted. Now, I'm laughing. Wanna hear the story? Well, you're going to. When we were attending our old church, Amanda had been really unhappy with the youth group situation. I told her that it was OK with us if she wanted to go to another youth group if she wanted to. I took her down to our current church, Puyallup Foursquare, and sat in on the youth service. I was BLOWN away. There was about 400 kids there. Chad, the youth pastor was AWESOME and the worship was jaw-dropping. I came home and told Joe about it. I bawled. Now, at this point we were not even thi...

(This picture was pasted to this blog from the website for Mad Church Disease by Anne Jackson. Click on the book image on my sidebar to be taken to the site) I just got an email from Amazon saying that my "purchase had shipped." I was confused and thought "I didn't make any purchase...." Then I read the email. The copy of "Mad Church Disease," by Anne Jackson, that I pre-ordered months ago was released EARLY! I encourage you to buy the book and spread the word. This is going to rock the church's world in an awesome, positive way!!

I had my thyroid bloodwork done today. They ran TSH and T4. TSH is a hormone secreted by the pituitary gland that tells the thyroid gland to secrete T3 and T4. So, if levels are abnormal it can tell them if I am hypothyroid or hyperthyroid or normal! I usually do that every year anyway. I have an ultrasound scheduled for Monday, January 26th. I am eager to see what they think. I had an ultrasound in 2002, so I'm hopeful they will be able to view those images to use as a comparison. I still would rather have it removed than get poked around, but I will wait to hear what my endocrinologist's opinion is. I'm sure he knows more than I do. :) On the other hand, I hope I can have an opinion, too. And who knows? Maybe all of this will be for nothing, and he'll say it's no big deal and they're going to "watch it" or something boring like that.....

Amanda received her acceptance letter into Whitworth University today! WOO HOO!! Praise GOD!!!

I'm experiencing a rare moment. I'm home.......ALONE. Of course, the dog and cat are always close by, but wow - it's so QUIET. This week was a pretty successful one at school. I took three "quizzes," and did pretty well, I think! (I don't have all the scores back). I am scanning well, finding ovaries and measuring endometriums..... We started scanning thyroids, and it was discovered that both lobes of my thyroid gland have some "things" on them. In fact one thing is a nodule that is taking up most of my left lobe! Needless to say, I called my endocrinologist the same day, and scheduled an ultrasound and appointment with him! I should find out before the end of the month what the nodules are. The good thing is, thyroid cancer is fairly rare. If it is thyroid cancer, it rarely metastasizes, so that's good, too. Plus, if the gland had to be removed (which it probably doesn't) one can live quite normally without a thyroid gland. Medica...

Well, I made it through my first week of Winter Quarter. Even though it is so hard, I am amazed that its awesomeness doesn't end. I am surrounded by such quality people and teachers each day. I'm not only learning lots about ultrasound, but about how fascinating and great people can be. I am receiving an education in many different ways.... This quarter, I think have 16 credits. It could be 18, but I can't remember. All I know is, my classes are: Pathophysiology II, Gynecologic Ultrasound, Small Parts and Superficial Structures and Physics II. I also have a four hour lab once a week. It's been very interesting scanning uteruses and ovaries, etc. I can't say it enough: I love doing this. I had to go buy an exercise ball for my hand, because my arm starts to shake when I am scanning for a longer period of time. It's kind of like pinching a pencil very hard and pushing down at the same time with your arm extended out - holding it like that until your muscles start ...

It's always fun to drag out Christmas as long as possible. This past weekend, we visited my mom, her husband and my brother in Port Angeles for Christmas #3. They still had quite a bit of snow, and then it decided to snow again the night we got there. Needless to say, the kids were excited and we stayed an extra night. I took the kids to see where my mom works as well as a visit to Swain's, the local "general store," that I used to frequent as a kid when I visited my Nana and Pa in Port Angeles. Speaking of Pa, the picture below is my 93-year-old grandfather at his friend's house. The house my mom now lives in is the house my Nana and Pa used to own. It's kind of funny that I grew up visiting them in that house, and now my kids visit my mom there..... Here is my mom with Amanda and Melanie... I took the kids to a sledding hill at the Hurricane Ridge information center. Ben turned out to be an awesome snowboarder! I took the girls to "Bella Italia," ...