I'm sad about something. I'm sad because there's this person I know who, out of the blue, said some pretty harsh, rude and mean things a few months ago. Well, emailed them. I decided to stay away from this person for a little while - not come around them and not pretend that everything is OK when it isn't. Then, when I felt ready, I have attempted to try to talk to this person over the phone. I said I want to talk and resolve things in a healthy way. They refuse to do so. They only want to email. I said no to that. I don't think it's healthy to email stuff back and forth. You can't hear the person's voice, their tone, their inflections, etc......
I want to communicate in a healthy way or not at all. I want more from our relationship than that. I also think that I didn't deserve the rude emails in the first place. I didn't deserve that at all. It has hurt me and hurt the relationship. Even so, I want to try to get the situation resolved. By refusing to talk with me, it sends the message that my feelings are not important. It's crazy. Here, I'm the one who was hurt and I'm the one attempting to make things right.
The other weird thing is, is this person has said they want a relationship, but it seems like they're not willing to do what it takes to have a healthy relationship!
Ugh. The really sad thing is, there is a major event coming up for this person, and I would have enjoyed being a supportive, part of that. Now, it looks like that is not possible. What am I supposed to do? I didn't start this whole thing, and now, this person isn't interested in making it right. I can't make them do the right thing, so does that mean the relationship is over? I kind feel like I have done my part to try to work things out. I guess if they're not willing to talk with me, I have to move on.
It's just so ridiculous. If they would be willing to talk and work things out, maybe the relationship could even be better than it was before! I don't get it. I just don't get it....
What is your input, my blog friends?
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6 comments:
Pray and love the person from afar. We can't change others. Remain willing and open to reconciliation, but don't lay yourself down as a door mat. Hand the person, and the situation, on over to Jesus and rest. :)
Ick to the whole thing! Sorry friend.
Thank you so much. It is ick. It's so unnecessary and ridiculous....
And we wonder why Jesus said to come to him like children. They are more honest, more forgiving, and more able to love without condition! :)
You have done what you can do so far. As Chelle said, keep praying from afar. If this major event coming up involves a get together with this person, I would go. As one of the crowd you can be there, but not be close to that person. You are mature, and can handle it! It would also show that you still want to pursue this friendship. After that, it's really up to him/her. You've talked, you've prayed, and God knows your heart.
Jodi, I think Chelle and Rochelle have said it best.
It may take a while or it may never happen (reconciliation) but just pray and leave it with God.
I need to follow my own advice. :)
Tom
It's hard for me to leave it alone - with God. I guess I want to see how to make it better myself - it's probably a control thing. I hate that it's happened, and that there's nothing I can do about it. But, I suppose the best thing to DO is give it over and pray. It's just hard when you know it doesn't have to be this way...
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